hey we're trying to WATCH here!

the theatre is dark, the only light coming from the huge screen... the audience is hushed... couples huddle closer together, hands tightly clasped, eyes are bright with unshed tears... emotion at its peak.

onscreen, she turns, slowly. he stands in the doorway, his fingers clenched around the frame, knuckles white. her face has lines where no lines had stood before, her hair greying but he sees none of these. standing out like a wound against the stark white of her face is the obscene bright red of kumkum high on her forehead.

his breath catches, her eyes falter. it had been years, fifteen years, but now, only now did he know how long it had really been!

he steps forward. she remains frozen, like a doe caught in headlights. "jaan," he calls her, his voice breaking. "you said you'd wait for me. just as i waited for you. you were, you are my life. but...."

only then does the emotion flash across her face. fifteen years and a husband later, he has come back! the audience waits for her response. the music begins to rise to a crescendo... she opens her mouth, her beautiful face mirroring a thousand emotions, and....

SHAKE that THING miss kana kana
SHAKE that THING miss annabella
SHAKE that THING yan donna donna

heads swivel, indignant voices sound. someone in the audience fumbles to answer his mobile phone, the loud, gratingly cheerful polyphonic ringtone still blaring. he answers it and his voice joins the trebulous one of the heroine's.

"Hello? ah...hi da rajesh... no no, i'm not busy.. just watching a movie now... where are you now? oh really? ha ha....is that so....?"

more voices sound, demanding silence. he talks on, oblivious, conscious only of his own wish to continue his conversation without having to budge an inch.

i hope you guys know where i'm going with this.

if there's one thing i HATE it's people who, one, leave there phones on loud during movies and two, who don't even bother to LEAVE if they have the urge to take calls!

and it's not uncommon.... every single person's gone through this at some point of time. the only thing that could possibly rival this in irritingness [not a word, but like i care!] is people who've seen the movie before and can't do anything but share that fact.

it was lord of the rings - the two towers. a movie i had been waiting to watch for DAYS. i went with a friend and the two of us settled down in eager anticipation. a group of college guys were behind us, cheerfully exchanging banter and the like.

now i've got as much of a sense of humour as anyone and we had to laugh when the guys shouted "heroine vandachu!" when orlando bloom raced across the screen, his blonde tresses streaming behind him. but then when they continued to mouth every single dialogue that followed, along with helpful comments like, "oh, now there's a fight and that one dies" it gets slightly more annoying.

i love watching movies in the theatre. i really do. the popcorn [no butter please], the seats, the idea that you're watching it with about two hundred strangers who are all enjoying it as much as you... it's awesome. just eradicate the kind of people i've mentioned above and everyone's happy. except them of course, but who gives a damn? :)